Well, I had to listen to it on iTunes as I think Marty is the only radio DJ to have accidentally played Monster Mash on Presidents Day when he spun up the tune on Springfield's very own, KBBL.¹
And it got me thinking, what music does one play on Presidents Day? Obviously the US national anthem would get a whirl, as would Rhianna's version of it ["Oh say does that star-spangled banner anner anner, eh eh eh" ... [okay, that's terrible]].
By devoting a few brain cells of thought to the issue one might come to the conclusion that there really isn't much you can play that is specific to this holiday. So in many ways Monster Mash is as good as any because most people aren't going to give a shit about a holiday that's only for government workers and school kids. Interesting.
¹From the episode, I Love Lisa.
Monday, 18 February 2008
The Things One Sees When Out & About
So I drove to the bank last week to deposit a cheque in the drive-thru ATM when what should I see staring back at me? A security guard standing outside the front door wearing an armoured vest, the surliest scowl in existence and the biggest, nastiest fuck off shotgun I've ever seen.
Honestly, it was so large it looked like he had ripped the gun off a tank because all the normal shotguns weren't big enough.
And did he take his eyes off of me as I drove past and turned into the drive-thru lane? Hell no, he kept his eyes and his trigger finger primed. Not that I look like a would-be bank robber, but I guess in his occupation everyone is a potential suspect.
So a word of advice to anyone out there thinking of taking up bank robbing as a career: I wouldn't, unless you want to lose half of your head in a shotgun blast.
Honestly, it was so large it looked like he had ripped the gun off a tank because all the normal shotguns weren't big enough.
And did he take his eyes off of me as I drove past and turned into the drive-thru lane? Hell no, he kept his eyes and his trigger finger primed. Not that I look like a would-be bank robber, but I guess in his occupation everyone is a potential suspect.
So a word of advice to anyone out there thinking of taking up bank robbing as a career: I wouldn't, unless you want to lose half of your head in a shotgun blast.
Thursday, 14 February 2008
It's Valentine's Day, Don't Ya Know?
If you forgot to get your significant other [or others, you dirty cad] something for Valentine's Day then you still have time! Well, if you're reading this on the other side of the International Date Line then Valentine's Day was yesterday and you're screwed.
My angle this year for Valentine's Day gifts was to get different items for the senses. For example, a dozen red roses for smell, sight, and feeling. A selection of groovy chocolates from Ghirardelli for taste. And finally the soundtrack to Juno and Michael Bublé's latest album, Call Me Irresponsible, for hearing. Throw me into the package and I'm sure it'll be a hit!
Happy Valentine's Day.
My angle this year for Valentine's Day gifts was to get different items for the senses. For example, a dozen red roses for smell, sight, and feeling. A selection of groovy chocolates from Ghirardelli for taste. And finally the soundtrack to Juno and Michael Bublé's latest album, Call Me Irresponsible, for hearing. Throw me into the package and I'm sure it'll be a hit!
Happy Valentine's Day.
Madge's Directing Debut On a Hiding To Nothing
Apparently Madonna directed a movie. The film, Filth and Wisdom, premiered at the Berlin Film Festival and drew quite the crowd of critics to its screening.
Madonna has been renowned as a major force in the music industry for the last three decades; yet her forays into other avenues of creative endeavor, be it acting or writing, have failed to make much impression.
Madge's move to behind the camera has left her open to a critical mauling based upon her previous attempts at creating anything other than music, and the suspicion is many of the critics who queued to get into Filth and Wisdom probably convinced themselves of its crappyness before the opening frames began.
Indeed, Sheila Johnson writing in the Telegraph noted "the movie is -- disappointingly, perhaps -- not an outright embarrassment", which to my ears sounds like the mother of all left-handed compliments. It also makes obvious the Telegraph critic had hoped for something more juicy to ridicule and was perplexed the director didn't come to the party.
Given Madonna's history it was obvious that unless she created a modern day Kane she was going to get savaged. The Guardian's film critic, Peter Bradshaw, admirably kept nothing back and threw some casual put downs throughout his remarkably honest review, declaring the film to be "incredibly bad" as well as "dumb and tacky". He even writes that if Madge had done the catering "they'd have had a Jonestown situation on their hands." Er, not quite sure how one can critique a vanity project by comparing it to a notorious mass murder-suicide, but if you're trying to be witty then whatever works for you, dude....
Are the critics that surprised about what they saw and what did they expect? Critics aren't exactly the brightest folk going around [much like bloggers, boom!] and some are several sandwiches short of a picnic. But if they went into the screening with the intention to eviscerate the film then why bother to critique?
Madonna has been renowned as a major force in the music industry for the last three decades; yet her forays into other avenues of creative endeavor, be it acting or writing, have failed to make much impression.
Madge's move to behind the camera has left her open to a critical mauling based upon her previous attempts at creating anything other than music, and the suspicion is many of the critics who queued to get into Filth and Wisdom probably convinced themselves of its crappyness before the opening frames began.
Indeed, Sheila Johnson writing in the Telegraph noted "the movie is -- disappointingly, perhaps -- not an outright embarrassment", which to my ears sounds like the mother of all left-handed compliments. It also makes obvious the Telegraph critic had hoped for something more juicy to ridicule and was perplexed the director didn't come to the party.
Given Madonna's history it was obvious that unless she created a modern day Kane she was going to get savaged. The Guardian's film critic, Peter Bradshaw, admirably kept nothing back and threw some casual put downs throughout his remarkably honest review, declaring the film to be "incredibly bad" as well as "dumb and tacky". He even writes that if Madge had done the catering "they'd have had a Jonestown situation on their hands." Er, not quite sure how one can critique a vanity project by comparing it to a notorious mass murder-suicide, but if you're trying to be witty then whatever works for you, dude....
Are the critics that surprised about what they saw and what did they expect? Critics aren't exactly the brightest folk going around [much like bloggers, boom!] and some are several sandwiches short of a picnic. But if they went into the screening with the intention to eviscerate the film then why bother to critique?
Helen Gets Tough on Tagging
Auntie Helen has finally decided that tagging [street art or graffiti or whatever you want to call it] constitutes too much of a headache for the public and it's time to get hard with some harsh penalties for convicted taggers.
I've seen some beautiful examples of art on the side of a building or on the wall of an underpass, works that were obviously created by talented individuals. I've even seen some brilliant stencils as well, particularly one of Joy Division's Ian Curtis that popped up around Wellington from time to time [I have a friend who knows a dude whom might have been responsible for creating that, but I can't be sure]. However, I have seen shit that is nothing more than a mutant signature sprayed by artistically-challenged individuals with gangster aspirations.
Unfortunately it's the mutant signature that is more prevalent than the creative kind of tagging, so it's no surprise that the government have decided to roll out some changes, notably a ban of spray paint to persons under 18, and the listing of tagging as a specific property damage offence with harsher penalties for the perps.
Naturally not everyone is stoked with this new action. Maori Party co-leader Tariana Turia believes tagging is about freedom of expression and suggests it is about "resistance" and "alternative points of view." Well, yes and no, Tariana. This can all get very subjective as freedom of expression can encompass many actions. But I'm not quite certain what this "resistance" angle is she's playing. Resistance against what? Getting a job? Contributing to the wellness of society? The Nazi occupation? It would be foolish to romanticise tagging as some noble pursuit because it's not. It costs a shed load of money to clean up what is essentially an eye-sore and I don't think you'll find too many people struggling to sleep at night over the impending law changes.
//Link// <<-- Story from NZ Herald.
I've seen some beautiful examples of art on the side of a building or on the wall of an underpass, works that were obviously created by talented individuals. I've even seen some brilliant stencils as well, particularly one of Joy Division's Ian Curtis that popped up around Wellington from time to time [I have a friend who knows a dude whom might have been responsible for creating that, but I can't be sure]. However, I have seen shit that is nothing more than a mutant signature sprayed by artistically-challenged individuals with gangster aspirations.
Unfortunately it's the mutant signature that is more prevalent than the creative kind of tagging, so it's no surprise that the government have decided to roll out some changes, notably a ban of spray paint to persons under 18, and the listing of tagging as a specific property damage offence with harsher penalties for the perps.
Naturally not everyone is stoked with this new action. Maori Party co-leader Tariana Turia believes tagging is about freedom of expression and suggests it is about "resistance" and "alternative points of view." Well, yes and no, Tariana. This can all get very subjective as freedom of expression can encompass many actions. But I'm not quite certain what this "resistance" angle is she's playing. Resistance against what? Getting a job? Contributing to the wellness of society? The Nazi occupation? It would be foolish to romanticise tagging as some noble pursuit because it's not. It costs a shed load of money to clean up what is essentially an eye-sore and I don't think you'll find too many people struggling to sleep at night over the impending law changes.
//Link// <<-- Story from NZ Herald.
Friday, 8 February 2008
Are Michael & Walt On The Freighter? Lost Kicks Up a Gear
Excellent episode of Lost last night; season 4 has definitely kept up the momentum of the last third of season 3, and the show is definitely the shizz once again.
The introduction of the Freighties has been perfect, and the new characters seem to have blended into the show seamlessly at the first attempt -- which is more than could be said about dear old Nicki and Paolo [and the less said about them the better].
The revelation that the Freighties came to the island specifically looking for Ben was something out of left field, as was the counter-revelation from Ben who claimed he had a man on their boat. This inside man got my brain ticking over and I began musing that Michael and Walt didn't get too far from the island after all; perhaps they've been kicking back on the freighter since the end of season 2? It would certainly explain Walt's message of doom regarding Naomi's people as told to Locke while he was lying in the mass grave of the Dharma Initiative.
Next week's episode should be another excellent hour in front of the box as we get to find out who the next member of the Oceanic Six is. It will be interesting to see a new perspective in the flash forwards being employed for specific Lost characters.
The introduction of the Freighties has been perfect, and the new characters seem to have blended into the show seamlessly at the first attempt -- which is more than could be said about dear old Nicki and Paolo [and the less said about them the better].
The revelation that the Freighties came to the island specifically looking for Ben was something out of left field, as was the counter-revelation from Ben who claimed he had a man on their boat. This inside man got my brain ticking over and I began musing that Michael and Walt didn't get too far from the island after all; perhaps they've been kicking back on the freighter since the end of season 2? It would certainly explain Walt's message of doom regarding Naomi's people as told to Locke while he was lying in the mass grave of the Dharma Initiative.
Next week's episode should be another excellent hour in front of the box as we get to find out who the next member of the Oceanic Six is. It will be interesting to see a new perspective in the flash forwards being employed for specific Lost characters.
Wednesday, 6 February 2008
So, Will NZ Win the Twenty20 Match Tonight?
Er, based upon the evidence from the first game against England in Auckland, then I don't believe so. It's unfortunate that retirements, injuries, and the ICL/ICC debacle have combined to saw the NZ team off at the knees. But, that's the way the cookie crumbles I guess.
It's a very young and inexperienced team so prepare yourself for more pain in the next couple of seasons. What's essential is the selectors hold their nerve and continue to select younger players because any chance to gain experience now will serve in the future.
Still, NZ might surprise everyone and get up to win this match tonight. I for one would be stoked if that happened.
It's a very young and inexperienced team so prepare yourself for more pain in the next couple of seasons. What's essential is the selectors hold their nerve and continue to select younger players because any chance to gain experience now will serve in the future.
Still, NZ might surprise everyone and get up to win this match tonight. I for one would be stoked if that happened.
Literary Snobbery, or: How To Ruin a Book Review With Your Opening Paragraph
Take a read of David Itzkoff's review of China Miéville's Un Lun Dun, and Neil Gaiman's and Michael Reave's Interworld in the New York Times.
You'll notice how he spends the first paragraph disparaging the readers and writers of speculative fiction aimed at young adults. In a nutshell, Itzkoff makes the suggestion that "self-respecting authors" are working without "artistic satisfaction" and lack "dignity" because they turn out stuff that isn't for adults with better tastes. WTF?
It's kind of funny, I would have thought any creative person who develops a story for publication would derive a shit load of artistic satisfaction and dignity, irrespective of the intended age group of the reader.
Remember kids: no matter how well constructed your review might be in later in the piece, and no matter how much you profess to now liking the books you decided to dirty your hands with, if you belittle the readers of such work and position yourself as a literary snob you're going to sound like a right cock.
You'll notice how he spends the first paragraph disparaging the readers and writers of speculative fiction aimed at young adults. In a nutshell, Itzkoff makes the suggestion that "self-respecting authors" are working without "artistic satisfaction" and lack "dignity" because they turn out stuff that isn't for adults with better tastes. WTF?
It's kind of funny, I would have thought any creative person who develops a story for publication would derive a shit load of artistic satisfaction and dignity, irrespective of the intended age group of the reader.
Remember kids: no matter how well constructed your review might be in later in the piece, and no matter how much you profess to now liking the books you decided to dirty your hands with, if you belittle the readers of such work and position yourself as a literary snob you're going to sound like a right cock.
Parcel of Comics Goodness
A completely unexpected parcel was waiting for me when we got home from Disney last week. My good mate Paul had sent me a care package of comics all the way from NZ for my 30th, which was bloody cool of him if I do say so myself!In the pack was the brilliant trade paperback 52, volume 1. 52 is an interesting concept set in the DC Universe exploring the missing year that began immediately at the conclusion of Infinite Crisis.
It is a year, originally released every week in real time for 52 weeks, that saw the DC Universe without it's "Big Three" characters: Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman. It's very cool, and was conceived and written by some of the best writers in comics today.
The other comics in the care package contained issue 0 of Grant Morrison's 7 Soldiers of Victory, and the four issue mini series, Klarion, a character first created by Jack Kirby who, if you're somewhat familiar with comics, is one of the most influential creators of comic books in the history of the medium, on par with a certain Stan Lee if I may be so bold to venture.I hadn't read much by Morrison, save for Arkham Asylum and All-Star Superman. However, after reading these issues I'm very keen to delve into more of his stuff as he's definitely the shizz.
So a big thanks to Paul for the excellent bundle of comics. I will now begin to formulate a reciprocal package of comics I think he might dig.
Hands Up Who Likes Food Poisoning?
No takers? And for good reason, for food poisoning surely is the suck. Now we've all had a case of the Delhi Belly whenever we've eaten something we shouldn't have. Every so often I would get a bout after eating KFC, particulalry the 1/4 pack with an extra piece of chicken [quite possibly one of the best combo meals ever devised in fast food restaurant history beaten only by McDonalds's famous Hunger Buster¹].
So anyway, you crap you puke you feel seedy but generally you get over it, right? Well, that rule was completely dumped on when I contracted the mother of all food poisoning while we were at Disney last week. Holy shit I thought I was going to die as every last frickn' litre of fluid in my body sought escape from the two most obvious orifices.
Oh pain like you've never felt; pain where it's not normal to feel pain. And the worst thing was I felt so bad for my wife who had to sit in the hotel with me while I tossed about on the bed like a prize wiener. Bless her heart she took good care of me as I staggered to and from the bathroom, but what a sucky way to spend your last night at Disney, eh?
Word of caution, avoid the duck whenever you decide to dine out. For the love of God avoid the duck.
¹ A Big Mac, a cheeseburger, large fries, a sundae, and a large Coke. They are the shizz, yo. Only available in NZ, I think.
So anyway, you crap you puke you feel seedy but generally you get over it, right? Well, that rule was completely dumped on when I contracted the mother of all food poisoning while we were at Disney last week. Holy shit I thought I was going to die as every last frickn' litre of fluid in my body sought escape from the two most obvious orifices.
Oh pain like you've never felt; pain where it's not normal to feel pain. And the worst thing was I felt so bad for my wife who had to sit in the hotel with me while I tossed about on the bed like a prize wiener. Bless her heart she took good care of me as I staggered to and from the bathroom, but what a sucky way to spend your last night at Disney, eh?
Word of caution, avoid the duck whenever you decide to dine out. For the love of God avoid the duck.
¹ A Big Mac, a cheeseburger, large fries, a sundae, and a large Coke. They are the shizz, yo. Only available in NZ, I think.
That Old Saying About New Zealanders Migrating to Australia
Raises the IQ of both countries? I think former PM Rob "Think Big" Muldoon once said that. I may have found the living embodiment of the quote.
Yes, apparently a migrant New Zealander living in Melbourne and identified only as "Stuart" was photographed speeding down the city's eastern freeway on a motorcycle with a BBQ strapped to his body.
A concerned motorist took the photo and handed it to a newspaper who published the pic, drawing the interest of the fuzz who are said to be investigating.
"Stuart" said he realises that perhaps it wasn't too bright an idea to wear a BBQ on his bike, but decided the BBQ constituted a "challenge" he could not resist, particularly after he had previously transported a two seater couch on the same bike. Nice one, Stu.
//Link// <<-- New Zealand Herald article.
Yes, apparently a migrant New Zealander living in Melbourne and identified only as "Stuart" was photographed speeding down the city's eastern freeway on a motorcycle with a BBQ strapped to his body.
A concerned motorist took the photo and handed it to a newspaper who published the pic, drawing the interest of the fuzz who are said to be investigating.
"Stuart" said he realises that perhaps it wasn't too bright an idea to wear a BBQ on his bike, but decided the BBQ constituted a "challenge" he could not resist, particularly after he had previously transported a two seater couch on the same bike. Nice one, Stu.
//Link// <<-- New Zealand Herald article.
del Toro & The Hobbit -- "Not a Sure Thing"
Aw, and here I was getting all excited that Guillermo del Toro was going to direct The Hobbit. Well, according to the director they're still negotiating so it's probably just stuff like t's needing to be dotted and i's crossed before everyone is happy.
But I'm happy, because del Toro was one of the directors I hoped would be involved when it was announced that Peter Jackson was not going to be behind the camera. If you've ever seen Pan's Labyrinth, you'll understand why.
//Link// <<-- From Cinematical.
But I'm happy, because del Toro was one of the directors I hoped would be involved when it was announced that Peter Jackson was not going to be behind the camera. If you've ever seen Pan's Labyrinth, you'll understand why.
//Link// <<-- From Cinematical.
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